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Mom, you need a bath. Not because you’re dirty (you actually smell quite lovely!), but because you need a half hour of time to turn off that tailspun mind of yours. You need a fancy scented candle that you won’t feel guilty burning, you need yoga, you need sleep, and yes, I know, you need more Twitter followers.

Do you ever feel the need to tell your mom what she needs? Don’t think physical objects, think about mind-body wellbeing. Moms have a spectacular way of being in touch with everyone else’s needs, yet this leaves them too often detached from the importance of their own. How do you tell her what she needs? You don’t. You spa her.

Be the caretaker for a change, and send your mom for a spa experience geared towards optimal health and wellness, and make it something that will make her smile. What kind of mom is your mom? Get her a Spa & Wellness Gift Card by Spa Week, and set her up with the perfect spa treatment match.

1. THE STRICTLY BUSINESSMOM

Your mom’s got meetings, phone calls, conferences, hands to shake, and a deadline at 9AM the morning after Mother’s Day. Seriously!? You watch stress take her down at night, you watch her head off every morning to a job doesn’t satisfy her creative pursuits, and you watch her type away frantically on her dreadful Blackberry. She needs an escape from the rigidity of her daily life—both mentally and physically. She’s got business in the front… she needs a party in the back.

SPA DIAGNOSIS: This woman holds a lot of tension in her back, neck and shoulders. Your Businessmom could use a massage, but I’ll tell you what she needs even more: a twist. Surprise her with a Cupping Treatment. This ancient Chinese therapy will have both instant and long-lasting benefits relieving back tension. Using suction cups that create a vacuum, this treatment gets stuck blood circulating again like no other. It creates temporary red marks, but they will never be visible under that boxy business suit! Her cool cupping experience will also make for good water cooler talk.

BONUS: Get her crayons and paper and draw together. Life doesn’t have to be so serious.

2. THE MILF

Just face it: your mom is a hottie. She looks better in those jeans than you do, and you know what? Despite your resentment, deep down you are proud of her. You aspire to be like her one day… as if you’re not developing her neurosis already. Like a good offspring, it is your job to support her ageless face in its progression into absolute timelessness. Take Gwen here, for example. You KNOW that Kingston totally got her the airbrushing for this photo for Mother’s Day.

SPA DIAGNOSIS: Show your MILF you love her and respect her genetic superiority with an anti-aging facial. Diamond microdermabrasion facials go a long way to keeping skin smooth, taut and young. It’s a non-invasive treatment that’s great for getting rid of lines in the face that look like wrinkles, but often are just an effect of dry skin. In a few years from now, you can take her for a mani-pedi and have the discussion: Mom, would you like me to get you Botox?

BONUS: Get her a compact mirror. Write a short “I love you” message inside – in Sharpie.

3. THE DR. OZMOM

Your mom started making bi-weekly salmon dinners as soon as Dr. Oz had a salmon episode. She just this week started purchasing vast amounts of vegetable powder.  She stopped using the microwave for some time after reading an article about it on the internet, but then started again because Dr. Oz said it was fine. She only goes by her RealAge.

SPA DIAGNOSIS: Acupuncture! Because Dr. Oz is really into it.

BONUS: A day on the calendar and the ingredients to make Dr. Oz’s Lemon Facial Cleanser… and a whole skincare lab worth of his many famous at-home spa recipes. FUN!

4. THE FIFTIES HOUSEWIFE

Julia Childs in the kitchen, Mary Poppins of the soccer carpool; your mom is a stay-at-home champion! Her life’s work is the series of perfect human beings she has created, and she takes joy in all things diapers, homework and pediatrician checkups. However, she forgets that her “stay at home” title doesn’t mean she can’t ever get out.

SPA DIAGNOSIS: Send your dedicated mom to a place where she has no choice but to channel that dedication to her own self. Send her for a day at the banya. Let her soak up the childless therapy of the jacuzzi, the eucalyptus steam room, the cold plunge and the various saunas. Help her get back the simple joy of being one with herself.

BONUS: A YouTube video parody song declaring your love for her.

5. THE VEGAN YOGIMOM

She meditates in the mornings and hits the yoga mat shortly after. You are served fresh made kale chips when friends are over. She shops only at Whole Foods. She’s centered and healthy and calm and she teaches you little life lessons over the sound of her juicer.

SPA DIAGNOSIS: Your mom is undoubtedly in an eastern hemisphere headspace, so why not help her plunge in deeper? She would love Ayurveda. Ayurveda is the traditional Hindu system of medicine which uses diet, herbal treatment, and yogic breathing. She would especially love Shirodhara, the soothing and spiritual pouring of warm oil over the third eye chakra.

BONUS: A Gluten-Free Macaroni Necklace.